i am a girl.
i am eighteen.
i live in a small town.
i'm attending high school.
i'll be graduating in june of this year.
i'm in the band and i play six different instruments.
i draw when i can, though they are mostly doodles.

here everyone knows me as a writer.
i am a decent writer.
i am not controversial or insane.
people tell me my poetry is nice and honest.
i write about my issues with abuse and my past,
sex and love, and what i want.

i'm lucky to be where i am, people have told me.
yet, i am selfish. i feel like i have accomplished nothing.

and this is because:

i see people posting pictures in compromising positions,
miles of cleavage pouring from shirts too small,
grainy photos of people falling just short of being porn stars.

they have minds and cameras,
but do they realize - people like their bodies simply for their bodies.
people like their pictures so they can whack off to them,
so they can get a five minute pleasure.

you will not find millions of pageviews and thousands of watchers filling my page.
you will not find people in love with me for my body -
people barely love me for my words.

you will not even see that mile of cleavage in the photos i do happen to take -
my breasts are much too small for that.

you will not even see curves rolling from my ribs to my hips -
i barely make 130 pounds, and at 5'5", i have not a perfect body.

but what you will see is a girl
who is eighteen, living in a small town
and trying. actually trying.
not just posting for the hell of it.
not just posting nudes because i have an amazing body (because i don't).

you will find a girl with some talent
trying to impress people
because that's all she knows how to do.